Nine lives. One standard.

A boutique practice for the discerning cat: property, estates, and the vigorous defense of nocturnal conduct. We accept few clients. Fewer accept us.

Arrange an Audience Your attorney may be asleep upon your arrival. This time is billable.

We do not chase ambulances. We chase what we choose.

$4.2M Recovered in treats

12,000 Red-dot claimants

0 Incidents forgotten

Practice

Red-Dot Fraud The pursuit of promises that cannot be caught. We catch them.

II.

Box Possession If one sits, one owns. An ancient doctrine, vigorously maintained.

III.

Nocturnal Conduct Zoomies at 3:00 a.m. Discretion assured; volume defended.

IV.

Belly-Rub Consent Revocable at the third stroke. Enforced at the fourth.

Cucumber Ambush Emotional-distress claims arising from vegetable-adjacent terror.

VI.

Bird Surveillance Compliance counsel for window-based intelligence gathering.

The Partners

Fia

Senior Partner

Called to the bar in 2026, having jumped onto it. Has never lost a staring contest with opposing counsel.

Coco

Managing Partner

Litigates exclusively between 5:00 and 5:15 a.m. Sleeps in fourteen-hour increments; bills in fifteen-minute ones.

“They recovered every treat I was owed. I pushed the cheque from the table, as is my right.”

Mr. B. - Plaintiff